There may be certain days in life when you are excited, moods elated and you are curious about the things to happen. This excitement within is called as Spark and makes you truly alive and we are born with these sparks. When we were kids small excitements made us jump on the bed. However when people grow many of them start missing this spark or it gets faded away while there are others who keep their spark alive in different forms. So the question is how to keep your spark alive and remain happy more of the time?

There are two aspects to keep this spark alive. First aspect is nurturing in terms of goal setting so as to give your spark the fuel, continuously and the second aspect is to guard against storms.  To nurture the spark, always have inspiring goals. It is human nature to strive, improve and achieve full potential. Money in terms of financial freedom is an achievement to keep the spark alive to certain extent. But earning more money it isn’t the purpose of life. If we see many billionaires who already have achieved that financial freedom, they hardly stop working. What makes them come to work and pursue for excellence each day? They do it because it makes them happy and feel alive. Striving for that next level keeps their spark alive.

Set goals that are balanced which means ensuring that health, relationships, mental peace are all in good order.  There is no point in celebrating a promotion if family relationship is at stake or the mind is full of tensions and similarly there is no fun in driving a luxury car if your back hurts due to spine problem. Life is not a race or comparison. Like in spoon race, there is no point coming first if the marble falls. Same with life, if health and relationships which are the marbles of life fall then the balance of life may get lost. Your striving is only worth it if there is harmony in your life and balance in all aspects. You may achieve success, but the spark or excitement will start to die. Success without happiness has no meaning.

Second aspect related to this spark is how to guard ourselves against the 4 storms of disappointment, frustration, unfairness and loneliness of purpose.

Disappointment will come when your effort does not give you the expected return. Failure is extremely difficult to handle, but it will make you stronger. Feeling miserable about failure, you may want to quit but remember it is never a failure but a feedback. If this is not working then challenge yourself that there may be better way of doing and hence approach the problem with a new perspective and remember that perseverance pays a lot.  When I started as Corporate Trainer, I went at least 15 times to a renowned company for 2 years before I got a program and once I did one program on trial, I conducted more than 20 Training Programs in its various units and on my terms. Initially even the security guard had not allowed me a gate entry for many occasions, but later on top management of the company also participated in my programs. If challenges could always be overcome, they would cease to be a challenge. Remember that the difference between Master and Beginner is that Master has failed more times than the Beginner has tried.

Frustration is the second storm. It happens when things are stuck and you have only one way to see the situation and you do not like it. You may be struck in traffic jams or thousands might have applied for the job you desire. Sometimes things may take so long that you don’t know if you chose the right goal. Frustration saps excitement and sucks your energy and can make a person bitter or blaming. Answer is just to have a side plan by creating possibilities, you have choice and with choice, you have freedom. Stagnation comes when ideas get stopped. You might have seen that whenever a new idea comes, your body and mind gets charged.  When I started my training programs, I invested time and money on marketing and for 6 months we just received useless calls. My wife was really worried as our savings were diminishing and we had the liability of paying EMI for housing loan and school fee for children. She suggested me to go back for a job as I was just 42 and few employers were keen about me. It triggered me a new idea, I persuaded these companies to try me for a time bound retainer ship with fixed number of days in month and I guaranteed them for results from my training and consulting. It was a new trend that time which helped me bring a regularity of income and freedom to explore and soon my training picked up to an extent that I trained 200000 participants from 500 client organizations

Unfairness can hit you hard, as people with connections, rich dads, and beautiful faces, can find it easier to make it and sometimes it is just plain luck. Merit and hard work is not always linked to achievement in the short term, but the long term correlation is very high, and ultimately the merit prevails. But realize there will be some people luckier than you. If you visit tribal/slum areas or see underprivileged persons in countryside, or visit Afghanistan or African countries, you may start realizing that you are pretty lucky. When I qualified for BHEL through an All India Test after my MBA, I was asked a choice of posting and I replied, ‘I am getting married soon and will be obliged if I can get a family accommodation irrespective of location, as I come from a village’. After my initial training in various BHEL units, I was posted in Namrup-Assam, while my colleagues got posting in cities or large units. I was given a furnished family accommodation in Namrup as BHEL was having a turnkey project in that remote place of Upper Assam. One day I found my wife weeping as she found 2 snakes in the house and the neighbor could understand her language. Although we liked beautiful Assam, festivals and hospitality of North East but my wife started fearing if our next posting again happens in isolated projects. Getting a posting in cities looked impossible unless you have High Connections. Despite being considered top PSUs that time, I left BHEL within a year taking a calculated risk of joining at less salary in private sector. However I focused on learning and contributions and soon I became HOD in another PSU and then Vice President of a World Class Organization at an age when I would have been merely a Manager or AGM in BHEL. Had I wasted my efforts in finding High Connections for a good posting, I would have missed my development and growth.  So whatever happens may have something good in store for you if you keep your eyes open. Don’t let unfairness kill your spark. Be thankful for what you have and accept joyfully what we don’t. Feel lucky if you have challenge on your way and accept it happily.

Finally, the last point that can kill your spark is isolation.  While there may be many similarities with colleagues during your college time, but as you grow, you may realize that you are unique.  Your desires and beliefs may be different from others. This can create conflict as your goals or opinions may not match with others and you may decide to drop some of your dreams. I had a dream of climbing Mount Everest or at least Everest Base Camp. I could not do so as it required sacrificing many of my other important dreams and was not matching to my family requirements. However I went for tracking on many challenging heights and conducted training programs in many adventure locations. If you have to give up some of your dream or passion by respecting the needs of others, do it joyfully without feeling being compromised. Treat your decision as calculated choice like an empowered person and your spark will be alive in this transition.

These four thunderstorms cannot be avoided, like the monsoon will surely come into your life at regular intervals but you just need to keep your raincoat handy.